Category Archives: Desires

Irony of Life

And on one of those thursday afternoons, she woke up and skimmed through her library. Fingers running through books on shelves. She wasn’t sure what she wanted to read. So the fingers kept running and her eyes kept looking. Her heart stopped at one of the books. She froze. Should she open it? It wouldn’t be just the book she would be opening. It would be years of memories. Was she ready to face it yet? Her fingers reached out. She opened it to page 69 and there is was… perfectly stored, still in one piece, the rose that he had given her on the Valentine, 13 years ago. It felt like yesterday. She could see him sitting on that bed and her sitting across…the casual way in which he had handed it to her. The only way he knew, where he never got emotional or attached or deeply involved. It probably was his way to protect himself from heartbreak. Or maybe he was just not made for a deep emotional romantic relationship. The smile that spread on her face and her heart was priceless when he gave it to her. She said she would store it in a book as a memory coz it was the only rose he had given her and could be the only one he ever will. He looked at her with surprise. He never understood how much they meant to her.. the little things.. He must have probably thought she was stupid to be so touched by simple things, to invest so much of her heart in something she knew would never last. She did it nonetheless.

She had loved him like no other. He was the one who had changed her, who had made her who she was, who had let her flower and blossom, who had let her see who she could be, who had managed to touch her soul. The tears fell and she read the wet words. ” God forgives, but you also have to be forgiven by people… and you have to forgive them. Forgiveness is also your responsibility. You must forgive and be forgiven. Psychoanalysis does not repair the damage. You still have to go beyond understanding and make changes, improve the world, repair relationships, forgive others and accept their forgiveness. Being active in seeking virtue is of the utmost importance. Lip service is not enough. Intellectual understanding without applying the remedy is not enough. Expressing your love is.”

She found peace in the fact that she had expressed her love, totally and utterly. She had followed her heart and taken the risk of destroying her life as she knew it. She had lost all her relationships for him. But there was not an ounce of regret. She did it because she felt he was worth every breath, worth every drop of blood. She could still see his skin and how it felt under her fingers, how he sometimes shuddered when she touched him or gave him an unexpected kiss. That flawless body, those curves, that smile… his touch.

She stood there for what seemed like eternity and then sighed and closed the book. ‘Only Love is Real’ – The story of soulmates reunited. What an irony to keep that rose in this book!!